I saw a picture of the Pieta today and it struck me to the core. I had just held Sophia in the same position trying to comfort her and cajole her before heading off to the first full day of school this year. To describe watching one's own child suffer and be unable to help them as "heart-wrenching" is an understatement, but I don't know any other words to describe the pain. Is there any other feeling of helplessness that comes as close?
I find it hard to put myself into her shoes. What is it like for sounds of a crowded gym to hurt your ears, for underwear to be painful to your skin, to actually feel your intestines moving food through them, to have people watching you try to navigate through life and making nasty comments about how inadequate or awkward your efforts are?
Sophia is not going to be healed, but I pray for the patience and grace to calmly offer her what encouragment and help I can as she suffers her way through childhood with Asperger's. She already knows too well that life is not fair...that she has been dealt an unfair disadvantage. How can an 8 year old understand the Providential plan of suffering when I don't even really comprehend it? So I will continue to ache when she aches and pray for our family.
How odd Christ must have felt walking through the world, perceiving the sufferings of all those around him discerning who needed intervention and who could persevere with just a word of encouragement. But then, that's what Mary also did, and what all mother's do on a daily basis. We comfort, console, encourage, take on the hurts of our loved ones, and we wait...for healing, help, hope